Nashville Trip

I’m heading to Nashville again at the end of the month. I’ve got some writing appointments, and Cyndi and I are going to spend some time vacationing for our anniversary.

We’re flying into Nashville and driving out to Chattanooga for a day or two. Then we’ll head back to Nashville and Cyndi will enjoy the hotel pool in the mornings while I write and we’ll do the show thing in the evenings.

I’m writing with a couple of great writers, and have a few slots open that I hope to fill before then. I love the challenge of preparing for a write session. I“m pretty much a solo writer, and although I’ve done cowrites in the past, most have been long distance.

No matter how many times I do it, though, I’m always a little nervous going in. I’m meeting with some new writers this time, though, and I’m excited about the prospects. Nervous, but excited.

A Lifetime of Temporary Relief!

I was watching the highlights of the greatest catch this year in major league baseball when I saw a Craftmatic III Adjustable Bed advertisement.

It advertised, “Call now to find out how you can get A Lifetime of Temporary Relief with the new Craftmatic III Adjustable Bed.

It struck me that a lifetime is certainly temporary..

What struck me funnier was that I was watching ESPN.. and apparently its a pretty geriatric crowd demographic who watches with me.

Maybe they should offer a cable box and plasma to go along with the Craftmatic III? Plasma .. I crack myself up.

Write hard. Write often

T

Traveling

Spent last weekend driving all over Michigan. Drove across to Grand Rapids to help my daughter move in to her housing for school this fall. She had a day off. We met with her in the morning, had lunch, drove out to Lake Michigan to walk the beach, drove back, had dinner and said goodnight. Whew. It went fast.

I’m extremely proud of her. She went on her first mission trip when she was in the 8th or 9th grade. and has been on some sort of mission trip every year since. Following her first trip, she volunteered at a youth camp in Central Michigan and has done so ever summer since. Last year she worked the summer as a counselor, and this year she is an Area Director at the camp, overseeing 10 or 12 counselors. She’s majoring in sociology with a minor in non-profit business administration and will graduate next spring. She doesn’t know the details, but she knows what she’s here for.

Stayed at a hotel in Grand Rapids that night, got up and drove to Mount Pleasant to attend a graduation party for our soon-to-be son-in-law of my older daughter. Got to meet a bunch of his family and had some great pulled pork and other goodies.

My wife was good enough to drive home, as I was tapped out.

The most entertaining part of the weekend was the fact that we brought our dog. His name is Mozart and I think he is used to driving in the car, only when he has a vet or groomer appointment, neither of which he particularly enjoys. This resulted in a demeanor, for most of the first part of the journey, that could best be described as nervous anxiety.

He did fine, though, and we’re all back home safe and on with our routines.

Blessings,

Tim

Accountable? Who Me?

I have this habit of hanging out on theology boards and acting like the cantankerous kid in the back who shoots spit-wads at unsuspecting souls. I’m sure its a sign of my destitute old-self lurking in the dark places of my heart, waiting to show his head when I least expect it... like my spit-wads.

I like to play the underdog position whenever I smell a wolf-pack. I’m not always right in doing so, and many times I should just let the herd feed. But sometime I get sucked in and volley a chunk of impala back and forth.

I make it a practice to always sign into these boards with my real name. It tends to keep me honest and upright, and cautiously reserved. But it doesn’t always work. Beyond my integrity, I find that I naturally prefer to be right at all costs, and make a total fool of myself in doing so.

A couple of days ago, in my haste I mis-read part of a post and completely skipped the rest as I couldn’t hit ‘reply’ fast enough. As a result I managed to insult the poster, and generally come off as an idiot.. and was accused, rightly of being one by means of a synonym. I reacted with my usual grace and shot back... only to realize, after re-reading the post and conversing with the writer, that I am, in fact, an idiot. Guilty as charged.

Humble pie is nasty stuff. I can only pray it puts hair on the chest.

Tim

I Need You

Nothing Special

Has anyone noticed that the most profound truths about the Christian life are riddled with pardox?

We die to ourselves in order that we may live.

If we give in order that we may receive, we are sorely disappointed, and yet when we give without motive, we are blessed.

We have the power right up until the moment that we think WE have the power... we are only strong when we humble ourselves in weakness to be indwelled and used.

I think there is another paradox that Christians often forget, or at least I do. I think that God can do whatever he needs to do without my talents. While, of course, that is true, the consequences of such a mindset are obvious. I think we confuse what we do know to be true with what we assume to be true.

For instance, he may know that I will be too introverted with my talent to make a difference. The resulting action is for me to mistakenly conclude that I will be used whether I act or not, a fatalistic approach that supercedes my motivations to make a difference.

It’s as if a part of me says, who do I think I am to act as if I am special or uniquely gifted to step up to a task that needs doing. If God wants something he will do it, with or without me. I will wait to "hear his voice". Act when I'm 'told' to act.

After all, I'm supposed to be humble, right? Bottom line, though, is that I am more concerned about what others think of my motives than what my motives actually are. Trace it back and the real cause is fear.

Now admittedly people do things "for God" when they're really doing them for themselves. That is, they want to earn favor with God, or possibly with other human beings. I do this... often. While this is a theologically incorrect motive, it occurs all the time as a part of each person's journey in spiritual maturity. But God is soveriegn. He knows what He's doing. God uses these people (and me) and the works that they produce in the process, even if their motive is not lilly white.

So, what does this have to do with me? With us as the church? We need not be fearful, and since we can rarely discern a person's motive, for sure, we should not jump to be a detractor or critic on the sidelines. We should always seek to encourage a person on their spiritual journey.

Certainly, I am not deserving of special favor, and yet I am crucial to God's plan. We're nothing special individually, yet we are all special, indeed invaluable as the body. We're put down here to change the world. Although we have nothing that God didn't give us, we have a job to do, and we must trust that if we faithfully seek his face he will redirect our paths to do his work in this world.

        I’m not trying to put myself down
        I believe God has a reason for keeping me around
        I was put down here to change the world
        But I hope that you can see
        That ain’t nothing special about me

Full Version of Nothing Special

Blessings,

Tim

Time Flies

So, I was in Amherst, New York this weekend for what will be my son’s last soccer tournament. He’s a senior in high school next year, and will probably not play club soccer when the next opportunity for soccer tournaments comes around.

Its been at least 10 years since I and my wife and son, (and sometimes my daughters when they were younger) hadn’t spent our memorial days in one of a half dozen states, in one soccer tournament or another. This weekend will most likely be the last. Another season in life comes to an end.

I was in a period of partial dread at the beginning of this week. I always have a great time, but with it comes being away from home, the expense of 3 nights in a nice hotel and lots of restaurant bills, and the inability to do anything around the house on the holiday weekend.

Then it occurred to me that this will be the last one. Wow. Seasons pass, some more graciously than others, but this one passed so quickly, and seemingly without a warning. As I look back on all the soccer photos, kids grow up so fast, and my son is no longer a boy. He’s also my youngest, which makes it all the more poignant. I guess my parents were right again. Time goes by before you know it.

I know I’m not alone in my feelings, although I sufficiently pig-headed enough to think I’m discovering an all-new emotion.

Can anyone relate?

If I Had Two Faces...

While addressing the press during a presidential campaign, Abraham Lincoln responded to allegations from a political opponent, accusing him of being two-faced. He is quoted as saying, “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?”

I’m finding more and more each day that I am rarely what I am, but instead what I want others to think I am. The problem, of course, is that what I want others to think is constantly changing as time passes. While its somewhat consistent, it can waiver depending on my immediate motives, or emotions.

At the root, there is the person who I really am, and if you think its this nice guy who’s humble and sweet, graceful and forgiving, or kind and courteous, you are gravely mistaken. Those are all things I try to be, but they are not the real me.

Truth is I spend must of my time throttling the real me and dressing him up to fit the moral and aesthetic standard I’ve established in my head. I’ve worked hard to learn the etiquette and moral standards that people have come to demand, but I’m really just that ‘count to ten’ person who strives to evaluate my behavioral choices before executing them.

This is all well and good, and (I assure you) a much better choice for me than acting on my immediate inclinations, but I still have become aware of something. I’m not naturally good, and no matter how hard I work to modify my behavior on an ongoing basis, it doesn’t seem to change my first inclinations, I’m just getting faster and better at playing the part.

I think, though, that I make a mistake when I get comfortable with this. It is the initial reaction that represents the real me. It is that initial reaction that needs to be tamed, not my fortitude to hold it back, modify it, and then let it show.

There was a campaign a while back that compelled people to do just this. WWJD. The implication being that when we are faced with our natural reactions, we think about what this perfect historical figure would do (all past-tense) in such an instance, and instead, should do what he would have done. Good idea. If the object is to modify our behavior (our physical actions and impact on others), this is good advice.

However, if one is talking about root change, not behavioral modification, I think the task is another one altogether. A task that’s bigger than what I am capable of doing by myself.

For me, at least, behavioral modification has more to do with my cognizance than my goodness. Ask Mel Gibson if this isn’t true. I never get drunk, (I can’t drink enough to do so without getting sick first) but I would imagine that would be the best way to see the real me. I know the same person peeks out when I’m tired, or too pre-occupied to grab him and hide him back in the closet. For instance, I apologize when I’m in a bad mood, as if to say, “Sorry. This isn’t like me.” Truth is, its more like me than I’d like to think.

I strive to surrender myself to be changed by the indwelling (present-tense) of the living Christ. I long for the times when I don’t have to count to 10 before I naturally do the right thing, when my first inclination is to think of others without the attached parasitical thought that this is what I’m supposed to do to be a good person.

I pray for REAL change.

Two Faces